TRAIN APPROACHING
WHISTLE SQUEALING
PAUSE! AVOID THAT
RUNDOWN FEELING!

 

A WHISKERY KISS
FOR THE ONE YOU ADORE
MAY NOT MAKE HER MAD
BUT HER FACE WILL BE SORE

 

THESE SIGNS WE GLADLY
DEDICATE TO MEN
WHO'VE HAD NO
DATE OF LATE

 


SPRING HAS SPRUNG
THE GRASS HAS RIZ
WHERE LAST YEAR'S
CARELESS DRIVE IS


 


PROPER DISTANCE
TO HIM WAS BUNK
THEY PULLED HIM OUT
OF SOME GUY'S TRUNK

 


SHE EYED HIS BEARD
AND SAID NOT DICE
THE WEDDING'S OFF
I'll COOK THE RICE

 


UNLESS YOUR FACE
IS STINGER FREE
YOU'D BETTER LET
YOUR HONEY BE

 


A CHIN WHERE  BARBED WIRE
BRISTLES STAND
IS BOUND TO BE
A NO MA'AMS LAND

 


DON'T KISS YOUR GIRLFRIEND
AT THE GATE
LOVE MIGHT BE BLIND
BUT THE NEIGHBORS AIN'T

 

5 - STAR GENERALS
PRIVATES 1st CLASS
SHOW EQUAL RANK
IN THE LOOKING-GLASS

 

LEAVES FACE SOFT
AS WOMAN'S TOUCH
YET DOESN'T COST YOU 
NEAR AS MUCH

 

HIS ROSE IS WED
HIS VIOLET BLEWs
BUT HIS SUGAR IS SWEET
 SINCE HE TOOK THIS CUE

 


BABY YOUR SKIN

KEEP IT FITTER
OR "BABY" WILL GET
ANOTHER SITTER


 

 

A MAN A MISS
 A CAR A CURVE
He KISSED THE MISS
AND MISSED THE CURVE

 

HE PLAYED THE SAX,
HAD NO B.O. BUT HIS
WHISKERS SCRATCHED
SO SHE LET HIM GO.

 


COLLEGE BOYS
YOUR COURAGE MUSTER
SHAVE OFF THAT FUZZ
AND COOKIE DUSTER.

 

IF HUGGING ON HIGHWAYS
IS YOUR SPORT
TRADE IN YOUR CAR
FOR A DAVENPORT

 

DON'T TAKE A
A CURVE AT SIXTY PER
WE HATE TO LOSE
A CUSTOMER

 


IF YOU MUST TEST
HER PUCKER PAINT
BE SURE TO DRIVE
WHERE TRAFFIC AIN'T

 

 

HE TRIED TO CROSS
AS FAST TRAIN NEARED
DEATH DIDN'T DRAFT HIM
HE VOLUNTEERED

 

TO STEAL A KISS
HE HAD THE KNACK
BUT LACKED THE CHEEK
TO GET ONE BACK

 

THE HOBO LETS HIS
WHISKERS SPROUT
IT'S TRAINS-NOT GIRLS
THAT HE TAKES OUT

 

I'D HEARD IT PRAISED
BY DRUG STORE CLERKS
I TRIED THE STUFF
HOT DOG! IT WORKS

 

RIOT IN DRUG STORE
CALLING ALL CARS
100 CUSTOMERS
99 JARS

 

LISTEN BIRDS
THESE SIGNS COST MONEY
SO ROOST AWHILE
BUT DON'T GET FUNNY

 

THE WHALE PUT JONAH
DOWN THE HATCH
BUT COUGHED HIM UP
BECAUSE HE SCRATCHED

 

DO NOT PASS
ON CURVE OR HILL
IF THE COPS DON'T CATCH YOU
THE MORTICIANS WILL

 

THE MIDNIGHT RIDE
OF PAUL FOR BEER
LED TO A WARMER
HEMISPHERE

NO  MATTER THE PRICE
NO MATTER HOW NEW
THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE
IN THE CAR IS  YOU

BOTH  HANDS ON THE WHEEL
EYES ON THE ROAD
THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
DRIVER'S  CODE

DRINKING DRIVERS
ENHANCE THEIR CHANCE
TO HIGHBALL HOME
IN AN AMBULANCE

 

GRANDPA'S OUT
WITH JUNIOR'S DATE
OLD TECHNIQUE
OLD BAIT

 

BOTH  HANDS ON THE WHEEL
EYES ON THE ROAD
THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
DRIVER'S  CODE

 

ON CURVES AHEAD
REMEMBER, SONNY
THAT RABBIT'S FOOT
DIDN'T SAVE THE BUNNY

 

HARDLY A FOOL
 IS STILL ALIVE
WHO PASSED ON A HILL
AT 65

 

VIOLETS ARE BLUE
ROSES ARE PINK
ON GRAVES OF THOSE
WHO DRINK AND DRIVE

 

MY JOB IS
KEEPING FACES CLEAN
AND NOBODY KNOWS
DE STUBBLE IV'E SEEN

THE WOLF IS SHAVED
SO NEAT AND TRIM
RED RIDING HOOD
IS CHASING HIM

FUZZY WUZZIE WAS A BEAR
FUZZY WUZZIE HAD NO HAIR
SO FUZZY WUZZIE
WASN'T FUZZIE WUZZIE

     
 

HHS Class of '58 Pages

A Stroll Down
Memory Lane

A Tribute to
Our Teachers

HHS Class of '58
Servicemen

HHS Class of '58
Sweethearts

HHS Class of '58
Memorial

HHS Class of '58
Prayer Board

Classics From
Our Past

 Staying In Touch

The Houses
We Lived In

 HHS Class of '58
Reunions

HHS Class of '58
50th Reunion

HHS Class of '58
Scholarship

A Bit of Hastings'
History

Ok Cafe

Hastings Drive-in

The State of
Nebraska

Our Awards

Apply for our Award

Guest Book

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